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  1. turbohaulic

    'Economic Stimulus' payment

    Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment. This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format: Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ? A. It is money that the federal government will send to...
  2. turbohaulic

    Tractor Striptease

    Billy Bob Cletus is passing by Billy Bob's hay barn one day when, through a gap in the door, he sees Billy Bob doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old green John Deere tractor . Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette, and gently slides off first...
  3. turbohaulic

    Amazing Story

    What an amazing story! In 1972, Joe Miller was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Tulsa Junior College. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Joe approached it very carefully...
  4. turbohaulic

    Fried Chicken

    Fried Chicken Our teacher asked us what our favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken." She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else in the class laughed. My parents told me to always be truthful and honest, and I am. Fried chicken is my...
  5. turbohaulic

    POOF and the light goes off

    POOF and the light goes off An 86-year-old man goes for a physical. All of his test results come back normal. The doctor says, " Gary everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?" Gary replies, "God and I are tight. He knows I...
  6. turbohaulic

    Bran Muffins

    Bran Muffins The couple were 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies. Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise...
  7. turbohaulic

    NEOLOGISMS (clever and funny!)

    Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. The winners are: 1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs. 2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how...
  8. turbohaulic

    Things got ya down?

    Things got ya down? Well then, consider these... In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 a.m., regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the...
  9. turbohaulic

    Vat Da Hell, Ole?

    Ole's car was hit by a truck in an accident. In court, the trucking company's lawyer was questioning Ole. 'Didn't you say, sir, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine, ?' asked the lawyer. Ole responded, 'Vell, I'll tell you vat happened. I had yust loaded my favorite mule...
  10. turbohaulic

    New all-terrain Vehicle

    Check out my new all terrain 4-wheeler. Here is a picture of me playing with it in the back yard. Be good and maybe Santa will bring you one too.
  11. turbohaulic

    Snow!!

    Yes more, gotta love this stuff:D This is up prov canyon above Logan area. We couldn't make it to the top of the quarry. Too much snow!
  12. turbohaulic

    Train Ticket

    TRAIN TICKET Three women and three men are travelling by train to the football match. At the station, the three men each buy a ticket and watch as the three women buy just one ticket. 'How are the three of you going to travel on only one ticket?' asks one of the men. 'Watch and...
  13. turbohaulic

    When girls don't put out!!

    When girls don't put out!! This was written by a guy...it is GREAT! I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart...
  14. turbohaulic

    Worst Age

    "Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old man. "You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing comes out." "Ah, that's nothin," said the 70-year-old. "When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat...
  15. turbohaulic

    Sunday Snow Run!

    Rot Box and I decided to go dirt biking today but decided to go snow wheelin instead. It started out not to bad but towards the end it was getting pretty snowy. Real fun trip and even better to be wheelin on my B-day!!:D
  16. turbohaulic

    The giant cigarette lighter

    The giant cigarette lighter A guy walks into a bar, sits down next to another guy and immediately notices the guy has a very large Bic cigarette lighter. The first guy says “Wow, that’s a huge lighter…where did you get it?” The guy replies “A genie from this bottle granted me one wish.”...
  17. turbohaulic

    Killing Flies

    A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking a round with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" she asked. "Hunting flies," He responded. "Oh, killing any?" She asked. "Yep, three males, two females," he replied. Intrigued, she asked, How can you tell? He responded...
  18. turbohaulic

    Weird Vibration

    I thought this was pretty funny:D To my mechanically challenged friends, male and female, “it’s making a funny noise" does not constitute an excuse to keep driving and hoping it'll go away. A woman ran over a mattress and decided to keep going anyway. The mattress got caught in the cars...
  19. turbohaulic

    Moab! Mar. 17-21st

    Went down to moab for a fun trip with my dad, brother's and a few friends. It was pretty good weather accept friday was a little stormy. We ran quite a few trails. Wednesday when we arrived we went for a quick run up cliff-hanger, then thursday went up pritched then around to behind the rocks...
  20. turbohaulic

    Big Game Hunter

    Big game hunter. A big game hunter walked in the bar and bragged to everyone about his hunting skills. The man was undoubtedly a good shot and no one could dispute that. But then he said that they could blindfold him and he would recognize any animal’s skin from its feel, and if he could...
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